I don't like to talk about my feelings w/ strangers

Today both my sister and dad told me that I should talk to a counselor. I haven't been doing too good lately. I have been depressed (beyond belief) that I am single. I can't shake this. I don't want to go but know that I need to. I just want this pain to go away right away. I haven't been able to stop crying today. I just need this pain to go away! Please go away.

I just have this feeling that I'm boring. That I need to change every thing about myself. I have never felt this way before and it is scaring me. I kinda just want to go to sleep for a few days and wake up feeling better.

Yawn

I think that I'm a boring person.

I think that I must be on a downward spiral today.... I sometimes don't know why people are my friends. What do I have to offer to them?

I need to start doing more. I need to be more exciting. I need a change.

I'm sorry to be such a downer today. I am just trying to talk through my feelings.

On now that we are on it..... I wonder all the time, why will a guy want to fall in love w/ me. It is almost impossible for me to see someone loving me unconditionally. It's what I want so bad but I don't see it happening.

I don't know what to do....

I had been doing fine. I had accepted it. Then I read a book. A love story. I can't get a hold of my emotions now. I have fallen apart. I am so upset that I'm single. The more I think about the book (which is a lot b/c I loved the book) the more upset I get. I don't know how to stop these emotions. Please just take them away. I have been a crying mess the last three days.

On top of it all, I now do not know if I think that fairy tale love exits. I have always thought that I would meet my prince charming and I don't think that it exists. I feel like I found out that there is no santa all over again.

I honestly don't know what is wrong w/ me right now. Stress, loneliness, a mental breakdown but I just want to be happy and I feel the complete opposite right now.